Back to Square One (Emily)

Here's my quote story thing, I did actually have it done for the meeting and a couple of the first people there read it. I forgot to post it though, and I didn't really proofread it (and I still didn't). I dunno, I just don't like it for some reason, probably due to my lack of planning, or just the way I wrote it. Or it could just be too darn random! I didn't really change anything, besides the removal of 'defiant' superglue (stupid typos). Oh yes, my other story is almost done too... heh.

Back to Square One

Somewhere, far away (in an alternate dimension), a young girl of thirteen was about to take her placement test for her next year in training. Her name was Jane. She looked rather plain, she wasn’t tall or short and her eyes were a boring shade brown, as was her hair. In fact, her pet fish, Alfred (which, by the way, floats around in the air) calls her plain Jane. This is all really beside the point though. Jane was actually quite intelligent, when she was not being frustrated with the bizarre dimension she lives in (which she is quite often, considering her dimension was rather irritating at times).

The tasks given were crafted to test intelligence and common sense, however, common sense is quite rare in a dimension where everyone thinks broom stealing aliens will take over the world and pink pogo sticks attack small children. The tasks appear quite… simple at first, but they are much harder than they seem.

Jane was rather shy, and quite cautious of other people. Which was quite understandable, you really can never tell if people are actually real or just your imagination, or even a projection. She also rather liked to play piano. That is, until her keyboard disappeared and was replaced by a hose-eating frog, which was just plain freaky.

Jane sat in a blue chair, which was crafted completely from flying pig feathers. She started to wonder how they managed to do that. After a few minutes she concluded that they most likely used superglue. Yes, superglue indeed. She knew from personal experience that it was quite strong; she had glued her fingers together a few years ago. She tapped her fingers restlessly on her knee, hoping she could start her task soon. Waiting made her nervous, and being nervous made her panic. She didn’t like to panic. Finally the speakers turned on, buzzing with a loud, distorted sound.

“The test will now begin.” droned the emotionless, empty voice through the static. Jane stood and gulped, anticipating what was to come. The scenery suddenly changed, replacing the empty warehouse-type room that she had previously been in. Jane now stood on a platform that highly resembled a checker board. Beyond the board there was only infinite, empty blackness. Black and white squares alternated on the board, and on each tile there was a number. She currently stood on the bottom-left corner, square number one.

“Your task is to get to the end of the board.” continued the voice. “If you make a mistake you will be sent back to square one.”

Jane nodded, it seemed easy enough. All she had to do was get to the end of the board, it wasn’t rocket science. She took a step forward, onto a black square labeled number nine.

“Error! Back to square one.” boomed the speakers. She reappeared back on square one. Maybe if she went diagonally? The end would be on the upper-right corner anyway, wouldn’t it? Jane stepped onto square ten.

“Back to square one.”

Jane put her hands on her hips, rather irritated to be on square one again. She decided that, maybe, just maybe, if she ran fast enough, she wouldn’t be sent back. She bolted across the board, only to find herself back on square one as soon as she touched a different tile. Well that’s annoying, thought Jane, pondering her situation. Perhaps if she jumped off of the edge, into the darkness, somehow she would land on the end of the board. She peered off the side, wondering if it was a good idea or not.

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you.”

Jane looked up, though she knew she would not be able to see where the voice came from.

“Why not?” she asked, annoyed.

“Because you’ll fall into an endless pit of doom?”

“Oh.”

Jane started to rethink the whole task. Why were there numbers? Then, suddenly, it hit her. She had to go across them in order! Of course… why hadn’t she thought of it sooner? Well, it was the evil chickens; obviously, they must have distracted her again. Stupid evil chickens. So, anyway, she carefully stepped onto square number two. Nothing happened. She smiled and stepped onto square three, and again, nothing happened! It doesn’t get much more interesting than this, and it takes a painfully long time, so I’ll end the story now.

…

The end!